Indiana Jones and the Nostalgic-Drivel Craptastic-Adventure [2008]

[Note:  May contain spoilers, etc blah blah]

So I saw Indiana Jones the other day, and the verdict is not so great.  I would liken it to taking the beloved old family dog out the back, try to make it do all the tricks it once used to do when it was much younger, then shooting it once you are satisfied you have ruined the last few hours of it’s life.  To be fair, I grew up on Indiana Jones as a little kid.  It spawned endless hours of dirt-digging, tree-climbing and cubby-making throughout my entire youth, so this latest incarnation was never going to be as good as the original movies.

However, the movie was so top heavy with crap, it didn’t even matter that it was living up to high childhood standards.  Unlike previous Indiana Jones adventures, our protagonist was portrayed less as an archaeologist, and more as a retired soldier.  References to previous missions were rife throughout the entire movie.  In this edition, “Indy” was lacking the well researched knowledge prior to his adventure, jotted carefully into a messy little leather book.  He seemed to be moreso going with the flow of what was happening.  In fact the movie portrayed itself as less of an adventure at all, and more a series of mishaps the “silly buffoon” Jones got himself into, and then managed to get out of.

Added to this is the heavy overuse of nostalgic crap.  “Wow with that hat on that shadow looks a lot like….  HURRAY IT IS! IT’S INDIANA JONES!” “Oooh, they are in the warehouse from Raiders of the Lost Ark.”  “Hey! That was a quick shot of the Ark itself!” “Wow, that is his son?!  With that other chick from the other movies!”  Fucking please.

It doesnt surprise me that George Lucas was involved,  after Star Wars was destroyed.  I guess it’s not too long until Mad Max, ET, Close Encounters of the 3rd Kind and Back to the Future get their metaphorical bullet-to-the-head that is a modern nostalgic money grabbing reincarnation.

It make me think, has the movie industry changed so much?  Surely there was a time when inventing new characters was more important than bringing in a few dollars.  Where is the Indiana Jones equivalent for the kids of today?  Maybe it’s pikachu.  Maybe this practice has always happens, and somehow I have never noticed.